Godzilla 1998, Rated PG-13

Buy it from

Starring Matthew Broderick. Released to DVD on November 3, 1998.

THE "IT SUCKED" REVIEW: Plot points in a film such as this--about a giant, mutant, radioactive lizard--are generally about as subtle as a kick in the face with a golf shoe. However, in Godzilla's case, even this is an understatement. The army is extraordinarily stupid, the air force is extraordinarily stupid, the parodies of Gene Siskel and Roger Ebert are extraordinarily stupid, and, with the exceptions of Matthew Broderick and Hank Azaria, the actors are all recycled material. I recognized half the cast from previous Dean Devlin/Roland Emmerich films, and the other half as guest stars on prime time television shows like Seinfeld.

Despite the fact that realism isn't a prime concern of Godzilla's, there were several issues that even I couldn't over look. Most of these came with the fact that Godzilla turns out to be asexual and lays approximately 200, 9 foot tall eggs in Madison Square Garden... and you thought Patrick Ewing's locker smelled bad before. If anyone can explain to me in which part of its body this lizard was carrying around 200, 9 foot tall eggs, I'd like to know. One would assume it might affect said lizards athletic jumping and swimming abilities, but such is not the case.

But by far though, the worst problem with this film was the surprisingly similarities between the little Godzillas that hatch and the velociraptors in Jurassic Park. And as Broderick and friends run around the Garden, chased by the 200 little Godzillas that all managed to hatch within the same 5 minute time period, I could well have been watching a scene from Jurassic Park 3: We Needed the Money.

THE "IT ROCKED" REVIEW: However, you're not going to have a movie with a budget of over $100 million without some truly eye-catching special effects. Devlin and Emmerich cultivated this technique in their earlier sci-fi films, Stargate and Independence Day, and brought this knowledge with them to Godzilla. This is where the idea of a 25 story tall reptile running around New York City really comes into play (his gall bladder is the size of this newspaper!). The Empire State Building is convincingly knocked down, and come to think of it, so is The Brooklyn Bridge. The city is in total chaos--which is saying a lot considering we're dealing with New York--the power is out, the phones are down, and the damn lizard finds a way to cause more damage than the rioting that would ensue should the Knicks ever manage to win a championship.

Emmerich, who directed Godzilla, employs the same technique that Steven Spielberg used while directing Jaws; during the first half of the movie, Emmerich keeps the lizard off-screen as much as is possible. This accomplishes two things: 1) it brings a heightened sense of fear to the viewers, and 2) it decreases the amount of money Emmerich spent on C.G.I., because had Godzilla been on-screen for the entirety of this film, Emmerich would have been looking at a budget well over $200 million.

So Bill Gates could conceivably take over the world with the amount of computer technology he has designed, whatever, so long as he keeps churning out products that can create the eye popping visuals presented on celluloid in Godzilla, let the man do what he wants. Godzilla was rather devoid of substance, but its special effects just kicked ass and that alone made this film rather entertaining.

And in the end, I have to say I enjoyed viewing Godzilla. It's got enough flaws to fill the Grand Canyon, but with the C.G.I. Emmerich and crew created, I just didn't care. This was an enjoyable special effects extravaganza. And you can plaster that all over your video marketing campaign.